Abu Dhabi, I hardly knew ye

Well, I’ve given Abu Dhabi three months and I’m done. But I’m not coming home, I’m just moving cities.

Since my visa came through and I’m now finally allowed to rent a house I’ve been looking for apartments for the last few weeks. Initially I was looking in Abu Dhabi, because I work closest to that city, but I realised that there was another city only slightly further away from where I work, Dubai.

I work out in the soulless desert in between Abu Dhabi and Dubai so I could either live in downtown Abu Dhabi, where is it as expensive as shit, or I could live in the outskirts of Abu Dhabi, where it is boring as hell, or I could live in Dubai, where it seems that every other expat with a choice is living.

A quick scan of the real estate market in Abu Dhabi sealed it for me. Abu Dhabi is about 10 years behind Dubai in terms of insane growth. During these growth periods the demand for houses far outweighs supply and the prices skyrocket. Dubai decided to build five billion apartment buildings after their first few years of crazy growth so now they have lots of apartments and prices are levelling out. Abu Dhabi is struggling to fill the demand for housing so prices are exploding. The hotel apartment I have been living in for the last few months increased their prices 30% this month. Fuck that.

So I’ve found a place in the Dubai Marina area. It’s on the side of Dubai closest to Abu Dhabi and right where the smaller of the two palm islands is (the Palm Jumeirah.) It's still pretty expensive by Australian standards, but less expensive that the shittier places I could have rented in Abu Dhabi. 120,000 AED a year is pretty average for a one bedroom in this area. I would convert it to Australian dollars for you but I think it might make me cry.

I was lucky enough to get a landlord who would let me pay by two cheques (one post dated) rather than one. Yep, it's normal to have to pay your entire years rent when you move in... plus 5% deposit and 5% agent's commission. Most expats get bank loans just to pay the rent.

Once again the video and sound is a little shitty. And replace the world ‘leafy’ with ‘dusty’, I think I was seeing a mirage.



Oh, and I know that tax return time is just around the corner so now that I have a pad I expect some visitors. See you soon.

Spirit Dwarf

This is awesome. I love the news.

Some pub in St Kilda is in trouble for having a promotion where a bare-chested dwarf walks up and down the bar pouring Jagermeister down your throat. Instead of being praised for being the booze pioneers that they are, these fine folk are being criticised for promoting binge drinking. For shame.

Pubs promote binge drinking? Really? Shit, I thought they were not-for-profit organisations trying to promote social cohesion. What makes this funnier is the quote from Mr Jagermeister;

“Jagermeister brand manager John Howells promised to investigate, saying the stunt was "not responsible service"”

This is Jagermeister right? The company that only became popular in Australia by a fad that involved dropping shots of their spirit into glasses of beer or Red Bull and skulling it? In other news, Phillip Morris pushes for more responsible smoking outside of airports.

I’ve got to mention it though, check out the bod on that little person. God damn, he’s cut.

This got me thinking. Over here in the UAE I can hire a live in housekeeper for 1000 Dirhams or about $300 a month. If I could hire a midget to pour spirits down my throat for a similar price then I’m afraid I just couldn’t turn that down.

Party at my place people. BYOM