What’s that Skip? You go well with barbeque sauce?

You know what we should all do? Stop eating beef and switch to kangaroo.

Bizarrely enough a recent story in the Gulf News (UAEs premier government censored news source) prompted me to think about this. The article said that Kangaroos fart and burp a hell of a lot less than cows do, and that cow farts release lots of methane which is really bad for the environment (much worse than CO2).

I’m sure this is just an AAP story doing the rounds, but I’ve been thinking and talking about the topic for a while now, so here goes my unresearched opinion.

Reasons that we should switch to roo:

Kangaroos are native to Australia, therefore the environment is used to them being around and they don’t mess it up to any great degree. Hard hoofed animals destroy the land. Two legs good, four legs bad.

Kangaroos can be wild for their whole lives, while cows have to be kept caged in. Ok, cows are stupid and probably don’t give a fuck that they are in a field because we have domesticated them to the point of being on an intellectual par with a carrot, but still, they are locked up as opposed to roaming free.

While cows generally live a pretty nice life just standing around in fields eating grass all day, they do have a pretty horrendous end. I’m pretty sure they know something is going on when they get herded into the house of screams that smells like blood and death. As much as I love my burgers, it plays on my mind that Bessy has a terrifying end.
Shooting wild kangaroos on the other hand is much better. They live their life just doing their own thing like normal, then one day a 10 gram piece of lead smashes through their skull at 1000 feet per second. Skippy doesn’t feel a thing.

The best environment for Kangaroos is natural bushland. So instead of clearing land for grazing and destroying the environment we can ‘farm’ them on natural Aussie bush. Or more realistically just knock down the fences and let the land go back to bushland.

Lastly, the roos have a sporting chance. Not much of a chance, admittedly, but at least a small chance that their super sensitive ears or super hopping will make the shooter miss. More chance than a cow in an abattior holding yard anyway.

So there you have it. You can continue to kill the environment if you want, but I’m grabbing my 308 and heading out bush. OK, I’m in the Middle East so that might be a bit hard, but I did see a few at the Dubai Zoo.

Here Skip!